Don’t throw in the towel yet…

By Charity Kuria

Never settle or get into a comfort zone. You were once a toddler and wished to be in school and hence would carry your older siblings schoolbag obviously too heavy for you. Then you joined nursery school and really felt on top of the world although you cried when your mom left you in a strange place. Then you got used to the idea of hopping into your school uniform every day that you even got up on weekends to go to school. You didn’t understand that days were different and that you needed rest.

During the weekends you spent with family and went to church. Come Monday morning you would be in class with your newly found friends. You quickly lapsed into a routine up until you knew that there was class one. Everybody in nursery school aspired and longed for the day that you would join class one. Your teacher encouraged you to study really well and join class one.

Years passed really fast and soon you found yourself in class one. You really felt nice and told everyone who cared to listen that you are now in class one. Later you discovered yet another challenge. Class eight!

Guys in class eight really looked cool and mature. Unlike you they were always clean and hardly, was there noise from their class. During the assembly they would be in a neat line behind everyone like a protective wall, while you were in the front line. Whenever the teacher on duty spoke saliva rested on your brows as you looked up to them listening. If you tried being cheeky, you would be noted and be punished on spot in front of everyone.

It seemed like forever but finally, you joined class eight and really felt like you’re on top of the world. You developed a spring gait, acted all grown up and when your voice broke, you really felt compelled to let everyone hear that bass. During the school holidays you wore side-burns and really felt like the coolest guy ever. The success cards started coming in and within one week you were done with your primary school education. What’s more? Immediately after that you became a man.

You joined high school. The day you landed in with your box, they called you ‘mono’ in dismay you aspired to be like the form 3s and 4s who pretty much owned the school as per your opinion. They never cleaned up or washed classes nor dormitories. 

All they ever did was make life miserable for you and then hope off to class for some serious study. At least from what the made believe.

Man! Years do fly and now you in the fourth form and again, the success cards started streaming in. you cherish them knowing that it’s the last time you ever receive such cards from friends and family. The exams were tricky but you managed to join university.

University! A phenomenon to behold. Here guys wear as they please to school. They even bring mobile phones ummh sorry!  Smart phones to class and nobody seems to care. Wow! Here guys type notes on their laptops. Life can never be better only that they call you a ‘fresha’

Again, you realise that you are at the start of that new phase of life. You are now longing for the day you finish with your course work, your internship and soon go out to the real world. Your graduation is superb with guys from shags having come on a hired bus. You are now the latest sensation and the pride of your village. Phew! You breathe out. School was both fun and hectic. More so that senior project that almost drove you nuts.

Five years down the line your first salary has long since become a TBT and you realise that guys your age no longer live in bedsitters. So you fight teeth and nail and rent a one-bedroom house along Thika road. You really feel nice leaving your bedroom via your living room to your kitchen to have a glass of water. You know, you are so used to the bedsitter that you smile broadly at the achievement even though the rent creates a big dent on your finances. 

In a bus on your way to work you see your old friend driving a blue Subaru. You can’t wave because he’s far or is it that you are embarrassed to be seen in a PSV? Quickly you take a loan and now you drive a Rav4. Congratulations that you are now neck deep in debts yet you haven’t started a family yet.

Family? Last weekend you attended a friend’s wedding. The other weekend you had been invited for yet another friend’s baby shower but couldn’t make it because of work. Basically speaking you realise that your friends are having families yet you live by yourself in that one bedroom apartment save for that occasional friend who once in a while will crash on your couch. Your quickly marry that office girl who is ever smiling at you. Six months later she can’t stand you and neither can you. You both call it quits.

Speaking of which last night your friend from way back invited you out for a drink. In the wee hours of the night too drunk to get home, he drove you to his home. The watchman opened the gate respectfully for his boss, the wife welcomed home her husband and the kids were happy to see daddy. Your friend lives in his own bought home, has a lovely wife and awesome kids and a car!

‘Where did I go wrong?’ you ask yourself as you go home the next day. 

You realise that life is a continuous series of challenges. One feat after the other. Sometimes you have to put your feet up, relax and let life happen without you trying to put everything in its rightful order. Don’t cut corners or race against your friend(s) move as per you and you will be content with who and what you are. Sometimes we are so engrossed with chasing success that we miss it. First, define success on your own terms then work towards it. All the best while you are at it!